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Tripped On A Crack

01 Sep

I seem to be the person that always trips on the crack in the cement while others can walk right over it and never even know it’s there. I gave my heart away to someone who cares not for the damage they have been able to do to it.

I finally have met someone who does care for me and he shows it constantly and tells me and I have put the “old one” on a shelf and have let go of those feelings that once ruled me. He has never really cared for me and has proven by his absence in my day to day life.

I am not ready to give my heart to another but I am open to being treated as with my world is more than gold. The “new one” calls me all the time and has sent me flowers to show of his affection but am I ready to let him closer?

Not so sure about that quite yet but we have spoke of his visit as he is getting to be quite insistent on visiting me. He has offered to fly me to visit him but I have already been burned once and will not get burned twice so he will have to come to me.

For years I have thought of no one but “Reggio” but I mean nothing to him and I know it so I have started to fantasize about being with “G”. He is so supportive of me and we have such great conversations that I look forward to meeting him.

I have replaced “Reggio” with “G” and I am starting to dream about him as well, this is a good sign as I am letting go of “R”. I know one day I will be with the one I am suppose to be with but until then I will focus on “G” and forget about “R”. 

Life is to short to wait for those that have no interest in spending time with me or has the same goals in life but there are always people who come into our lives and really do nothing but drain us and take from us. Life is so much easier when we have someone who shows interest in us.

I have decide to finally yes finally after three years to let go of the skeleton that has been in my closet and he holds no love for me and I no longer fool myself into thinking it is true. I am moving on because I must and I will no longer be held back by a person that cares none for me.

“G” is showing great interest in me and I even had my first dream of him last night and I have begun to think more and more about him as every passing phone call gives me more thoughts of him and wanting to spend time with him.

No, I do not have feelings of love for him but I do enjoy him and I think I will be inviting him to stay with me in a couple weeks. He really excites my brain and he makes me laugh and makes me happy. The easiest way to forget someone is to replace them with someone as good if not better and I think I have finally found better.

The more interested I am in “G” the less I think about “R” and that is a good thing because I need a real man in my life not someone who spies on me and doesn’t really care for me at all. I have been nothing but a diversion for him as he builds up his “delta miles”.

The sad thing about “R” is he thinks fame and fortune will make him happy and he chases after it like a $100 bill in the wind. He has let what happiness that has come his way go right on past him and I have no room left in my life for him.

 

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Posted by on September 1, 2012 in Define Me

 

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